OOPS I did it again
Well it has happened but this time I was ready for it. I lost 20lbs and stopped. Super frustrating and super disappointing. But here is where I proved to myself that this time is different. In the past when I would get stuck at the 20 or 30 lbs I would quit! I would say oh well I'm just going to go get some ice cream. I would get so frustrated and upset that I would turn to food. So you might ask what did you do this time? My initial thought was well I knew this would happen. My second thought was so what are you going to do about it? Guess what not once .....not once did the thought oh well I'm going to go get ice cream ....come into my mind. This time what came into my mind was ok maybe I need to shock my body and eat even less. So that is what I did. I won't know until Saturday if I lost weight this week. But even if I didn't, I feel so much better and guess what. I am one step closer to doing a Pilates Role up. YAY!!! That is so exciting to me. I've been working on it for 2 years. Plus I lost .5 inches everywhere. So I have nothing to be sad about. Now it is Saturday and I lost 2 more lbs. You might think that isn't very much but for me I celebrate every pound I lose because this time I'm in a different mind set for it to not come back.
Now I want to talk about something else that I learned.
When I was younger my mother told me that if you have a problem with someone you should write them a letter with all your feelings in it and then burn it. I'm here to tell you that it truly does work. In this process of recreating a better me, I was told about a thought download. This is what I have done my whole life for people that have hurt me or made me mad. I want to take this a step farther and say you can do this with anything. I've done it with food. I wrote down everything , and I mean every thought, feeling and just everything that deals with food and me. Food has been my OBSESSION! Body image has always been on my mind. Writing down your thoughts on whatever it is that you want to work on to get better at, opens up a new look on that thing. So take food for instance, when I started writing down everything I thought about food, I realized I loved food and made it a part of my life in every aspect of my life. I was living to eat the foods I loved. I was not eating to live my life to the fullest. I would love going to any kind of party just to see what kind of food they have there. Haha Now when I go to receptions or parties, I go to see the people. I go to visit with the people not check out the food. I can't say that I don't look at the food because old habits are hard to get over but I look at the food in a different way. In my mind I know there are just some foods that I won't ever eat again. Anyone that knows me knows I love bread. I could sit and eat 10 dinner rolls and still want more. I could eat a whole loaf of homemade bread and not even think about it. So here is my thought down load on bread........my mom made the best bread, soft on the inside, crust on the outside, golden brown, melts in your mouth even without butter, everyone loved my mom's bread. I wonder if this will taste like my mom's bread. That is always my thought. It always went back to my mom's bread where I had no control because my thoughts were I may never get this again. My parents were older when I was born and so I knew that they would be gone before I was to old. My dad died when I was 32 and my mom died when I was almost 35. I had my parents longer than some people do but now that they are gone I remember my most favorite memories with them and it was with food. But really we had so much fun with other things. They would play games all the time. I would play with them when I could. The other day I was reminded of watching Flintstones with my mom. She loved that show! We would watch old western movies together. We would go on trips in the summer. I have so many good memories that do not include food.
Do you see how a thought down load can help you change your thoughts. I still think of my mom when I see bread, I still think (I wonder if that bread will taste like my moms) but now I think (nope nothing will ever compare to my mom's bread and I don't need to try it) and I leave it at that. I don't need bread to help me remember my mom and dad. I don't need food to help me remember my mom and dad. I just need my memories. I just need to look at something and think (that reminds me of my mom and dad and oh how I miss them) nothing will ever replace me missing them. Nothing will ever replace my wonderful memories of them. I think of the memory and celebrate that I had the best parents ever.
Go do a thought down load, I promise it will help. You may cry the whole time you are doing it but after it is over you will feel better. Just let those thoughts and feelings fly free......that is what makes me feel better. NOT FOOD....FOOD WON'T MAKE ME FEEL BETTER ONLY I CAN DO THAT BY FEELING MY FEELINGS AND RECOGNIZING WHAT THEY ARE.
Now I want to talk about something else that I learned.
When I was younger my mother told me that if you have a problem with someone you should write them a letter with all your feelings in it and then burn it. I'm here to tell you that it truly does work. In this process of recreating a better me, I was told about a thought download. This is what I have done my whole life for people that have hurt me or made me mad. I want to take this a step farther and say you can do this with anything. I've done it with food. I wrote down everything , and I mean every thought, feeling and just everything that deals with food and me. Food has been my OBSESSION! Body image has always been on my mind. Writing down your thoughts on whatever it is that you want to work on to get better at, opens up a new look on that thing. So take food for instance, when I started writing down everything I thought about food, I realized I loved food and made it a part of my life in every aspect of my life. I was living to eat the foods I loved. I was not eating to live my life to the fullest. I would love going to any kind of party just to see what kind of food they have there. Haha Now when I go to receptions or parties, I go to see the people. I go to visit with the people not check out the food. I can't say that I don't look at the food because old habits are hard to get over but I look at the food in a different way. In my mind I know there are just some foods that I won't ever eat again. Anyone that knows me knows I love bread. I could sit and eat 10 dinner rolls and still want more. I could eat a whole loaf of homemade bread and not even think about it. So here is my thought down load on bread........my mom made the best bread, soft on the inside, crust on the outside, golden brown, melts in your mouth even without butter, everyone loved my mom's bread. I wonder if this will taste like my mom's bread. That is always my thought. It always went back to my mom's bread where I had no control because my thoughts were I may never get this again. My parents were older when I was born and so I knew that they would be gone before I was to old. My dad died when I was 32 and my mom died when I was almost 35. I had my parents longer than some people do but now that they are gone I remember my most favorite memories with them and it was with food. But really we had so much fun with other things. They would play games all the time. I would play with them when I could. The other day I was reminded of watching Flintstones with my mom. She loved that show! We would watch old western movies together. We would go on trips in the summer. I have so many good memories that do not include food.
Do you see how a thought down load can help you change your thoughts. I still think of my mom when I see bread, I still think (I wonder if that bread will taste like my moms) but now I think (nope nothing will ever compare to my mom's bread and I don't need to try it) and I leave it at that. I don't need bread to help me remember my mom and dad. I don't need food to help me remember my mom and dad. I just need my memories. I just need to look at something and think (that reminds me of my mom and dad and oh how I miss them) nothing will ever replace me missing them. Nothing will ever replace my wonderful memories of them. I think of the memory and celebrate that I had the best parents ever.
Go do a thought down load, I promise it will help. You may cry the whole time you are doing it but after it is over you will feel better. Just let those thoughts and feelings fly free......that is what makes me feel better. NOT FOOD....FOOD WON'T MAKE ME FEEL BETTER ONLY I CAN DO THAT BY FEELING MY FEELINGS AND RECOGNIZING WHAT THEY ARE.
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